Changes

'Tis the season to begin thinking of the proverbial New Year's resolution.  Most of us make them.  We go full force with the intent to keep them and change our lives for the better instantly, only for the desire to fade, the enthusiasm and motivation flicker and ultimately, the flame die.  This has happened to me time and time again.  I keep trying to come up with a resolution that I will like so that I can stick with it... such as, eating more ice cream.  Why can't that be my resolution with no ill effects?

For me, making changes for the better requires 3 things:  resolve, patience and time.  Many of us have the resolve to do better in certain areas of our lives, but we lack the patience to give it the time needed.  Hence the reason many enthusiastic newbie runners end up with injuries and the feeling that running is somehow "bad" for them.  When we are excited, we jump head first (and full force) into it.  With running, you CANNOT DO THAT.  Your body is not ready for speed and volume, even if your mind is.  So when a few weeks in we find ourselves with sore everything, we decide it isn't for us.  Not only that, we've burnt ourselves out trying to run every single day, never allowing ourselves a break for fear of breaking some magical cycle.

So if running is on your agenda for 2013, let me give you a small piece of experiential advice.... take it slow, be humble, start with 3 days a week and increase gradually.  But most of all, BE CONSISTENT!!!  That is your biggest factor for success.

Before Thanksgiving, I wrote about our challenges with Jack and his performance in both school and at home.  I promised myself that before we made the decision to medicate him for ADHD (inattentive type), I would try whatever I could to manage him unmedicated.  If after a trial period, it was obvious he could not function successfully in school without meds, then we would begin the search for the right medication.  Translation... I would not let a stubborn mindset about medication keep my son from reaching his academic and social potential.  ADHD is a biochemical issue and some kids simply need it.  But first I wanted to be CERTAIN he needed it.  I made reference to some dietary changes that we were making that were very difficult.  After extensive reading and searching, we decided to remove gluten from his diet.  There have been many documented successes with elimination diets in regard to managing ADHD without medication.  We have also removed the majority of processed foods from his diet (and now subsequently ours), as much research has pointed to additives and preservatives as "triggers" for these kids.  We've also added an omega-3 supplement and a children's probiotic, both of which are recommended for kids like Jack.  We were able to  pinpoint that large amounts of sugar trigger meltdowns and complete lack of attention at home, so that too, has been lessened considerably.

Yes, we are becoming that ridiculous family that I used to make fun of.  I never believed or put much stock in what I would call "granolas".  And although I feel my family's diet is way off from that definition, it's slowly inching that way.  I have yet to plant my own organic vegetable garden and I do not have cattle in my back yard that I am grass feeding (but I have moved toward grass fed beef...).  But we also live in a busy and real household with lots going on, so yes, sometimes, LaRosas is on the menu for dinner.  See?  Balance :)

I have to credit my sister, Maria, and her influence on our family's diet.  Maria made some extreme changes in her daughter, Ellie's diet.  Ellie suffered from a long list of vague symptoms that both puzzled and made my sister crazy trying to figure out if her issues were really physical or psychological.  Being a single mom with a full time job, Maria's diet was to say the least, sub par.  She will tell you that herself.  With a heavy emphasis on processed and fast foods, Maria did what was quick and easy to suit her busy life.  But Ellie's constant fatigue, malaise, mood swings, complaints, stomach aches and headaches sent Maria on a quest for answers.  I give her worlds of credit for not buying the "Irritible bowel" or other diagnosis the pediatricians were guessing.  Finally out of desperation, she put Ellie on a dramatic elimination diet.  It was like a light switch.  Had I not seen the changes with my own eyes, I would not have believed it.  My once very stoic niece, who adorable as she was, was never happy at any age, has blossomed into this smily, happy, feeling good little girl.  She is delightful!  Maria has since been able to reintroduce some of the things she pulled out, knowing now her exact triggers.... corn and soy, which are seemingly in EVERYTHING (aka corn syrup and soy lecithin) and in which over 90% that is put into food is in the "GMO" (or Genetically Modified) category.  Ellie cannot eat any animal product in which the animal is grain fed.  It must be from a grass fed source, since corn is such an issue.  Upon Maria's further research, which she has done exhaustively and much more extensively than me, she has learned about what exactly our food sources contain and is pretty certain the FDA is approving poisons in our food.  I am not quite there as I have not done any scientific research on any of this.  But it's hard to ignore the ever increasing incidence of allergies and ADHD in kids as well as cancers that are affecting people at an alarmingly high rate these days.  From a strictly statistical standpoint, the evidence is glaring what is in our food is a culprit.  Again, I say this with caution as I have no proof, rather simply cause to think so.  Is a fresh ear of corn on the cob bad?  Of course not!  But the crap they put into the corn they use in processing probably is.  So Needless to say, thanks to my sister, I've bitten on this one.  And I'm glad I have as it seems to be helping Jack too.


In addition to diet, Jack now has a strict bedtime of 8:45.  The goal is to have him asleep by 9 pm every night.  This requires either John or I to physically lay in his bed until he nods off.  We were finding that although he had a decent bedtime, he was distracting himself with various activities and staying awake until God knows when.  Everyone knows I go to bed early.  At times, something would wake me up at 10:30 or 11:00 and Jack's light would still be on and he'd be drawing or reading or making a mess in his room.  The truth is, I cannot tell you exactly how much sleep he was getting each night.  I only know he was difficult to wake each morning and at least 3 nights a week, he would wet the bed (make fun of him for this and you'll deal with mama bear).  The pediatrician told us this is normal with some kids his age still (especially boys), but I have also learned it also goes hand in hand with ADHD.

We are now about 5-6 solid weeks into all these changes and the results are ASTOUNDING!  In two weeks, with more sleep per night (about 10-10.5 hours), Jack has not wet the bed.  His math teacher has texted me at various times saying he is having some "amazing" days.  Homework is taking much less time, he's more obedient and attentive at home.

One could argue it's the sleep.  But if you think we are going to change anything right now, think again.  What puzzles me is that he is sleeping LONGER and having no bed wetting incidents.  When he was sleeping less, they were what I would consider frequent for a 10 year old.  That physical change is enough to keep me doing everything the same and leads me to believe that diet "could" be a contributing factor when it comes to this.  Why else would more sleep cause fewer accidents?

Jack is still Jack.  He is quirky and a bit immature for his age.  But that is what makes him completely lovable to me.  I didn't want his personality to change, I just wanted him to be able to reach his potential.  I feel like I have the best of both worlds...the real Jack who is doing very well right now.

It has been really hard to keep up the diet.  I get complaints daily from Emma, my little chocoholic, that there is "nothing" to eat in the house.  What she means is that there is nothing to eat that she would like... junk.  Organic dairy and produce is expensive and with growing kids, I am constantly at the grocery store.  Often times I find myself thinking "Just forget it.  I'm sure what we used to eat is just fine...".  And maybe it is, but I wholeheartedly put a lot of stock in a "clean" diet now more than I ever did as evidenced by Jack's progress and as I also mentioned, my niece.

Our success has also been in Jack's unbelievable ability to stick to it.  Perhaps he physically feels better or is noticing that focus comes a bit more easily than it used to.  I'm not really sure.  The first two weeks were tough.  He was agreeable, but was having a tough time and would often say "I HATE this diet..."   He was so addicted to crackers, pretzels and anything flour based that I am sure he was experiencing withdrawal.  I worried that our days with it would be numbered as I realized how very little control I have over my kids and what they eat at school if they are trading snacks or being given friends' snacks (I can assure you, none of his friends likely want his lunch).  But Jack is very diligent.  He finally got to buy on soft taco day, with me forgetting that the soft shell tacos were flour tortillas, not corn (which he can have).  When he got home, he said "mom, the shells weren't gluten free so I just ate the inside."  Victory!

My point... change is HARD.  Especially when it is not immediate.  I don't doubt there will continue to be many days where I find myself questioning the validity of an extreme wellness diet.  But put my child's well-being in the mix and give me positive results and it's enough to keep me keeping on.

Here's hoping all of your resolutions for 2013 bring about the changes you most desire.

Merry Christmas!