"Our age is in search of an authentic vision of the human person. Are we just animals? Are we intelligent animals? Or are we children of God? Are we the result of evolution, a big bang, the loving hand of a creator or some combination of these? Are we here to grasp as much pleasure as possible in our brief time or is there a higher calling and purpose in our lives? The way we live, love, work, vote and participate in a society is a direct result of the vision of the human person that we subscribe to.
Here in America, we spent more than thirty billion dollars last year on diet products. That is more than we spend on books, and more than the gross domestic product (GDP)of at least fifty nations in the world. Now it would seem to me that the only diet most of us need is a little bit of discipline. But we don't want any discipline. We want someone to get on the informercial and tell us that if we take this little pill twice a day, every day, we can eat whatever we want, whenever we want. We want someone to tell us, "You can be healthy and happy without discipline."
The truth is, you cannot be healthy and happy without discipline. In fact, if you want to measure the level of happiness in your life, just measure the lever of discipline in your life. You will never have more happiness than you have discipline. The two are directly related to one another." Matthew Kelly, Rediscover Catholicism.
No wonder marathoners and distance runners are the happiest people on the planet!
All kidding aside, I took this quote from the mentioned book. If you attend Catholic mass anywhere in Cincinnati and did so on Christmas Eve or Christmas, you received this book from the archbishop. I was skipping through sections on the book and came to a section on fasting. This was where I found the quote. And although I am in no way a person who likes to fast, I got his point and I got why from a secular standpoint, it is important (lots more in the book on this subject...). But what caught my eye was what was being said. I told my mom on Christmas that reading that chapter articulated almost every point of why I want to do a 100 mile ultra marathon. It probably articulated the thoughts and feelings of many marathoners, Ironman triathletes and any other group of people that push themselves to extremes.
"Your body has a voice, and it talks to you constantly. You wake up, and the body cries out, "feed me," so you eat. A couple of hours later the body cries out, "I'm thirsty," so you drink. Later the body cries out, "I'm tired," so you rest. Again the body cries out, "feed me," and you do. WHEN IT'S TIME TO EXERCISE YOUR BODY CRIES OUT, "I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT," so you don't. And at the end of the day, the body calls out, "I'm ready for bed," so you sleep. Whether we are aware of it or not, our bod is ordering us around most of the day. The body is always crying out, feed me, sleep me, please me, nourish me, wash me, relieve me, water me...
But where is this voice leading us? In a modern climate, most people's bodies are winning the battle for dominance between body and soul. In a sense, the body is like money-- a great servant, but a horrible master."
For much of my life, I have let the voice of my body dictate. I don't deny myself much at all. Often times, I feel entitled to just lay around and do nothing and have plenty of justification why I am entitled. I know exactly why my house is sometimes a mess... and it isn't due to the age old excuse of lack of time, either. We constantly get messages from society and from others to just "give yourself a break. Who cares if you don't get some of the things you'd planned on doing done?" Well I wouldn't care if I truly had just cause not to do some of these things. But all too often the reason is "I don't feel like it."
I think entering the world of ultra distances is changing that for me in many respects. First of all, there are MANY times during a long training run that you have to mentally (and sometimes verbally), tell your body's multiple complaints to STFU (really, need I spell it out?)! You become very good at ignoring your body's ever constant commands. And as long as there is no legitimate injury, or health concern going on, each incident changes you just a little. Practice quieting that voice for a few years, training cycle after training cycle, and it changes you a lot.
I didn't want to run trails yesterday morning. And a million things told me it wasn't a good idea. The stuff hitting the window sounded like ice, not snow. The wind sounded miserable and the park gates were closed. But experience has shown me time and time again, these are sometimes the greatest moments in training. So I instructed John to park at the junior high school and we'd run to the park trails. Greg and Kim were joining us and God love them, they were game. Kim had thousands of calories to burn and Greg, well he will run just about anytime, anyplace.
By the time we got to the trails, we were good and warmed up. The wind was not a big issue and the trails were a bit slushy, but not icy. By the final mile, it was snowing heavily and it was so beautiful. There we were, the day after Christmas, in the woods, doing what we love in the most glorious weather I can imagine myself running it. It was Heaven.
So often, these are the enormous rewards of discipline. Time and time again, I have to silence the voice of my body that longs for ease and comfort. When I do, my heart and soul are filled with immeasurable happiness. This is true in all aspects of my life... helping others when it's inconvenient, looking at my husband and sincerely apologizing even when it's hard, restraining myself when my kids have absolutely shredded my last nerve and making time for silent prayer every day, especially the busiest of days.
So Matthew Kelly is correct: You can never have more happiness than you have discipline. The two are directly related to one another.
Wishing you the happiest of New Years!
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Monday, December 17, 2012
Changes
'Tis the season to begin thinking of the proverbial New Year's resolution. Most of us make them. We go full force with the intent to keep them and change our lives for the better instantly, only for the desire to fade, the enthusiasm and motivation flicker and ultimately, the flame die. This has happened to me time and time again. I keep trying to come up with a resolution that I will like so that I can stick with it... such as, eating more ice cream. Why can't that be my resolution with no ill effects?
For me, making changes for the better requires 3 things: resolve, patience and time. Many of us have the resolve to do better in certain areas of our lives, but we lack the patience to give it the time needed. Hence the reason many enthusiastic newbie runners end up with injuries and the feeling that running is somehow "bad" for them. When we are excited, we jump head first (and full force) into it. With running, you CANNOT DO THAT. Your body is not ready for speed and volume, even if your mind is. So when a few weeks in we find ourselves with sore everything, we decide it isn't for us. Not only that, we've burnt ourselves out trying to run every single day, never allowing ourselves a break for fear of breaking some magical cycle.
So if running is on your agenda for 2013, let me give you a small piece of experiential advice.... take it slow, be humble, start with 3 days a week and increase gradually. But most of all, BE CONSISTENT!!! That is your biggest factor for success.
Before Thanksgiving, I wrote about our challenges with Jack and his performance in both school and at home. I promised myself that before we made the decision to medicate him for ADHD (inattentive type), I would try whatever I could to manage him unmedicated. If after a trial period, it was obvious he could not function successfully in school without meds, then we would begin the search for the right medication. Translation... I would not let a stubborn mindset about medication keep my son from reaching his academic and social potential. ADHD is a biochemical issue and some kids simply need it. But first I wanted to be CERTAIN he needed it. I made reference to some dietary changes that we were making that were very difficult. After extensive reading and searching, we decided to remove gluten from his diet. There have been many documented successes with elimination diets in regard to managing ADHD without medication. We have also removed the majority of processed foods from his diet (and now subsequently ours), as much research has pointed to additives and preservatives as "triggers" for these kids. We've also added an omega-3 supplement and a children's probiotic, both of which are recommended for kids like Jack. We were able to pinpoint that large amounts of sugar trigger meltdowns and complete lack of attention at home, so that too, has been lessened considerably.
Yes, we are becoming that ridiculous family that I used to make fun of. I never believed or put much stock in what I would call "granolas". And although I feel my family's diet is way off from that definition, it's slowly inching that way. I have yet to plant my own organic vegetable garden and I do not have cattle in my back yard that I am grass feeding (but I have moved toward grass fed beef...). But we also live in a busy and real household with lots going on, so yes, sometimes, LaRosas is on the menu for dinner. See? Balance :)
I have to credit my sister, Maria, and her influence on our family's diet. Maria made some extreme changes in her daughter, Ellie's diet. Ellie suffered from a long list of vague symptoms that both puzzled and made my sister crazy trying to figure out if her issues were really physical or psychological. Being a single mom with a full time job, Maria's diet was to say the least, sub par. She will tell you that herself. With a heavy emphasis on processed and fast foods, Maria did what was quick and easy to suit her busy life. But Ellie's constant fatigue, malaise, mood swings, complaints, stomach aches and headaches sent Maria on a quest for answers. I give her worlds of credit for not buying the "Irritible bowel" or other diagnosis the pediatricians were guessing. Finally out of desperation, she put Ellie on a dramatic elimination diet. It was like a light switch. Had I not seen the changes with my own eyes, I would not have believed it. My once very stoic niece, who adorable as she was, was never happy at any age, has blossomed into this smily, happy, feeling good little girl. She is delightful! Maria has since been able to reintroduce some of the things she pulled out, knowing now her exact triggers.... corn and soy, which are seemingly in EVERYTHING (aka corn syrup and soy lecithin) and in which over 90% that is put into food is in the "GMO" (or Genetically Modified) category. Ellie cannot eat any animal product in which the animal is grain fed. It must be from a grass fed source, since corn is such an issue. Upon Maria's further research, which she has done exhaustively and much more extensively than me, she has learned about what exactly our food sources contain and is pretty certain the FDA is approving poisons in our food. I am not quite there as I have not done any scientific research on any of this. But it's hard to ignore the ever increasing incidence of allergies and ADHD in kids as well as cancers that are affecting people at an alarmingly high rate these days. From a strictly statistical standpoint, the evidence is glaring what is in our food is a culprit. Again, I say this with caution as I have no proof, rather simply cause to think so. Is a fresh ear of corn on the cob bad? Of course not! But the crap they put into the corn they use in processing probably is. So Needless to say, thanks to my sister, I've bitten on this one. And I'm glad I have as it seems to be helping Jack too.
In addition to diet, Jack now has a strict bedtime of 8:45. The goal is to have him asleep by 9 pm every night. This requires either John or I to physically lay in his bed until he nods off. We were finding that although he had a decent bedtime, he was distracting himself with various activities and staying awake until God knows when. Everyone knows I go to bed early. At times, something would wake me up at 10:30 or 11:00 and Jack's light would still be on and he'd be drawing or reading or making a mess in his room. The truth is, I cannot tell you exactly how much sleep he was getting each night. I only know he was difficult to wake each morning and at least 3 nights a week, he would wet the bed (make fun of him for this and you'll deal with mama bear). The pediatrician told us this is normal with some kids his age still (especially boys), but I have also learned it also goes hand in hand with ADHD.
We are now about 5-6 solid weeks into all these changes and the results are ASTOUNDING! In two weeks, with more sleep per night (about 10-10.5 hours), Jack has not wet the bed. His math teacher has texted me at various times saying he is having some "amazing" days. Homework is taking much less time, he's more obedient and attentive at home.
One could argue it's the sleep. But if you think we are going to change anything right now, think again. What puzzles me is that he is sleeping LONGER and having no bed wetting incidents. When he was sleeping less, they were what I would consider frequent for a 10 year old. That physical change is enough to keep me doing everything the same and leads me to believe that diet "could" be a contributing factor when it comes to this. Why else would more sleep cause fewer accidents?
Jack is still Jack. He is quirky and a bit immature for his age. But that is what makes him completely lovable to me. I didn't want his personality to change, I just wanted him to be able to reach his potential. I feel like I have the best of both worlds...the real Jack who is doing very well right now.
It has been really hard to keep up the diet. I get complaints daily from Emma, my little chocoholic, that there is "nothing" to eat in the house. What she means is that there is nothing to eat that she would like... junk. Organic dairy and produce is expensive and with growing kids, I am constantly at the grocery store. Often times I find myself thinking "Just forget it. I'm sure what we used to eat is just fine...". And maybe it is, but I wholeheartedly put a lot of stock in a "clean" diet now more than I ever did as evidenced by Jack's progress and as I also mentioned, my niece.
Our success has also been in Jack's unbelievable ability to stick to it. Perhaps he physically feels better or is noticing that focus comes a bit more easily than it used to. I'm not really sure. The first two weeks were tough. He was agreeable, but was having a tough time and would often say "I HATE this diet..." He was so addicted to crackers, pretzels and anything flour based that I am sure he was experiencing withdrawal. I worried that our days with it would be numbered as I realized how very little control I have over my kids and what they eat at school if they are trading snacks or being given friends' snacks (I can assure you, none of his friends likely want his lunch). But Jack is very diligent. He finally got to buy on soft taco day, with me forgetting that the soft shell tacos were flour tortillas, not corn (which he can have). When he got home, he said "mom, the shells weren't gluten free so I just ate the inside." Victory!
My point... change is HARD. Especially when it is not immediate. I don't doubt there will continue to be many days where I find myself questioning the validity of an extreme wellness diet. But put my child's well-being in the mix and give me positive results and it's enough to keep me keeping on.
Here's hoping all of your resolutions for 2013 bring about the changes you most desire.
Merry Christmas!
For me, making changes for the better requires 3 things: resolve, patience and time. Many of us have the resolve to do better in certain areas of our lives, but we lack the patience to give it the time needed. Hence the reason many enthusiastic newbie runners end up with injuries and the feeling that running is somehow "bad" for them. When we are excited, we jump head first (and full force) into it. With running, you CANNOT DO THAT. Your body is not ready for speed and volume, even if your mind is. So when a few weeks in we find ourselves with sore everything, we decide it isn't for us. Not only that, we've burnt ourselves out trying to run every single day, never allowing ourselves a break for fear of breaking some magical cycle.
So if running is on your agenda for 2013, let me give you a small piece of experiential advice.... take it slow, be humble, start with 3 days a week and increase gradually. But most of all, BE CONSISTENT!!! That is your biggest factor for success.
Before Thanksgiving, I wrote about our challenges with Jack and his performance in both school and at home. I promised myself that before we made the decision to medicate him for ADHD (inattentive type), I would try whatever I could to manage him unmedicated. If after a trial period, it was obvious he could not function successfully in school without meds, then we would begin the search for the right medication. Translation... I would not let a stubborn mindset about medication keep my son from reaching his academic and social potential. ADHD is a biochemical issue and some kids simply need it. But first I wanted to be CERTAIN he needed it. I made reference to some dietary changes that we were making that were very difficult. After extensive reading and searching, we decided to remove gluten from his diet. There have been many documented successes with elimination diets in regard to managing ADHD without medication. We have also removed the majority of processed foods from his diet (and now subsequently ours), as much research has pointed to additives and preservatives as "triggers" for these kids. We've also added an omega-3 supplement and a children's probiotic, both of which are recommended for kids like Jack. We were able to pinpoint that large amounts of sugar trigger meltdowns and complete lack of attention at home, so that too, has been lessened considerably.
Yes, we are becoming that ridiculous family that I used to make fun of. I never believed or put much stock in what I would call "granolas". And although I feel my family's diet is way off from that definition, it's slowly inching that way. I have yet to plant my own organic vegetable garden and I do not have cattle in my back yard that I am grass feeding (but I have moved toward grass fed beef...). But we also live in a busy and real household with lots going on, so yes, sometimes, LaRosas is on the menu for dinner. See? Balance :)
I have to credit my sister, Maria, and her influence on our family's diet. Maria made some extreme changes in her daughter, Ellie's diet. Ellie suffered from a long list of vague symptoms that both puzzled and made my sister crazy trying to figure out if her issues were really physical or psychological. Being a single mom with a full time job, Maria's diet was to say the least, sub par. She will tell you that herself. With a heavy emphasis on processed and fast foods, Maria did what was quick and easy to suit her busy life. But Ellie's constant fatigue, malaise, mood swings, complaints, stomach aches and headaches sent Maria on a quest for answers. I give her worlds of credit for not buying the "Irritible bowel" or other diagnosis the pediatricians were guessing. Finally out of desperation, she put Ellie on a dramatic elimination diet. It was like a light switch. Had I not seen the changes with my own eyes, I would not have believed it. My once very stoic niece, who adorable as she was, was never happy at any age, has blossomed into this smily, happy, feeling good little girl. She is delightful! Maria has since been able to reintroduce some of the things she pulled out, knowing now her exact triggers.... corn and soy, which are seemingly in EVERYTHING (aka corn syrup and soy lecithin) and in which over 90% that is put into food is in the "GMO" (or Genetically Modified) category. Ellie cannot eat any animal product in which the animal is grain fed. It must be from a grass fed source, since corn is such an issue. Upon Maria's further research, which she has done exhaustively and much more extensively than me, she has learned about what exactly our food sources contain and is pretty certain the FDA is approving poisons in our food. I am not quite there as I have not done any scientific research on any of this. But it's hard to ignore the ever increasing incidence of allergies and ADHD in kids as well as cancers that are affecting people at an alarmingly high rate these days. From a strictly statistical standpoint, the evidence is glaring what is in our food is a culprit. Again, I say this with caution as I have no proof, rather simply cause to think so. Is a fresh ear of corn on the cob bad? Of course not! But the crap they put into the corn they use in processing probably is. So Needless to say, thanks to my sister, I've bitten on this one. And I'm glad I have as it seems to be helping Jack too.
In addition to diet, Jack now has a strict bedtime of 8:45. The goal is to have him asleep by 9 pm every night. This requires either John or I to physically lay in his bed until he nods off. We were finding that although he had a decent bedtime, he was distracting himself with various activities and staying awake until God knows when. Everyone knows I go to bed early. At times, something would wake me up at 10:30 or 11:00 and Jack's light would still be on and he'd be drawing or reading or making a mess in his room. The truth is, I cannot tell you exactly how much sleep he was getting each night. I only know he was difficult to wake each morning and at least 3 nights a week, he would wet the bed (make fun of him for this and you'll deal with mama bear). The pediatrician told us this is normal with some kids his age still (especially boys), but I have also learned it also goes hand in hand with ADHD.
We are now about 5-6 solid weeks into all these changes and the results are ASTOUNDING! In two weeks, with more sleep per night (about 10-10.5 hours), Jack has not wet the bed. His math teacher has texted me at various times saying he is having some "amazing" days. Homework is taking much less time, he's more obedient and attentive at home.
One could argue it's the sleep. But if you think we are going to change anything right now, think again. What puzzles me is that he is sleeping LONGER and having no bed wetting incidents. When he was sleeping less, they were what I would consider frequent for a 10 year old. That physical change is enough to keep me doing everything the same and leads me to believe that diet "could" be a contributing factor when it comes to this. Why else would more sleep cause fewer accidents?
Jack is still Jack. He is quirky and a bit immature for his age. But that is what makes him completely lovable to me. I didn't want his personality to change, I just wanted him to be able to reach his potential. I feel like I have the best of both worlds...the real Jack who is doing very well right now.
It has been really hard to keep up the diet. I get complaints daily from Emma, my little chocoholic, that there is "nothing" to eat in the house. What she means is that there is nothing to eat that she would like... junk. Organic dairy and produce is expensive and with growing kids, I am constantly at the grocery store. Often times I find myself thinking "Just forget it. I'm sure what we used to eat is just fine...". And maybe it is, but I wholeheartedly put a lot of stock in a "clean" diet now more than I ever did as evidenced by Jack's progress and as I also mentioned, my niece.
Our success has also been in Jack's unbelievable ability to stick to it. Perhaps he physically feels better or is noticing that focus comes a bit more easily than it used to. I'm not really sure. The first two weeks were tough. He was agreeable, but was having a tough time and would often say "I HATE this diet..." He was so addicted to crackers, pretzels and anything flour based that I am sure he was experiencing withdrawal. I worried that our days with it would be numbered as I realized how very little control I have over my kids and what they eat at school if they are trading snacks or being given friends' snacks (I can assure you, none of his friends likely want his lunch). But Jack is very diligent. He finally got to buy on soft taco day, with me forgetting that the soft shell tacos were flour tortillas, not corn (which he can have). When he got home, he said "mom, the shells weren't gluten free so I just ate the inside." Victory!
My point... change is HARD. Especially when it is not immediate. I don't doubt there will continue to be many days where I find myself questioning the validity of an extreme wellness diet. But put my child's well-being in the mix and give me positive results and it's enough to keep me keeping on.
Here's hoping all of your resolutions for 2013 bring about the changes you most desire.
Merry Christmas!
Friday, December 7, 2012
And So it Begins...
"I certify that I am adequately trained, physically fit, and capable of participating in this 100 mile ultra-endurance event over and off roads, trails, and extremely rugged terrain and I recognize the significant risks involved, such as exhaustion, physical injury, heat stroke, dehydration, and vehicle and pedestrian traffic. In consideration of allowing my participation in the Burning River 100, I hereby waive and release all claims and liabilities arising directly or indirectly out of, or relating to my participation in that event, and I further agree to indemnify and hold harmless Western Reserve Trail Running, Inc., Cuyahoga Valley National Park, Cleveland Metroparks, and Metroparks Serving Summit County, and their respective directors, trustees, officers, affiliates, agents, contractors, representatives, and volunteers from all losses, costs, liability, damages, and claims arising from my participation....."
Uh, YES.... wait, MAYBE.... oh, jeez, I don't know. Where is the "I think so" box. Or even better the "I sure as hell hope so" box for me to check.
I was going to wait to register until January 1st. But since I couldn't stand "not training" any longer, I officially jump started 100 mile training this week (which conveniently started with a rest day... going well, don't you think?) Give me credit, though. Two months is a long time to be resting. Since the MCM on October 27th, I have been running very sporadically. Mostly 3 days a week and not very far, either. My longest run was 10 miles (this past weekend). So that was a good 5 weeks of downtime and about as much as I could handle. I realize I SAY a lot of things I don't really mean. And saying I was going to take it easy for two months turned out to be one of them.
So this is my adventure/goal for 2013. To COMPLETE the 100 mile distance in the Burning River 100 on July 27/28th. You know it's a long-ass race when the race date has 2 days listed!
The looks one gets when telling people about this are not of admiration like they are when telling people you are running a marathon. It's funny, the response is usually "...all in one day? Why? That sounds horrible and unsafe." And to those people's credit, they are right. I remember being with Jack during his 2nd Burning River (yes, the one I said I would NEVER, EVER do... please refer to the above sentence about me saying things I don't mean). Anyway, there were horrible and scary moments. There were times I felt it was unsafe for him to go on. I was miserable and was completing less than 1/3 the distance. But that wasn't my race and it wasn't about me so I couldn't possibly understand that Jack's mindset was totally different than mine. He was committed and ready to complete it and I was not. He spent a crazy amount of time preparing the psychological aspect needed to succeed. I had not. And I believe that without question, he KNEW his life was never in danger, even though I didn't. He felt terrible and was exhausted, but that is to be expected when doing an event like this. And because he pushed past all of it, he realized just how much the human body can endure. This is something so few people are willing to go find out. They aren't wrong or necessarily missing out for not wanting to, but the point is that we always have perceived limits and then we have actual limits. The difference between the two is ENORMOUS. I remember the surprise of my pregnancy with baby number 3, Jack. In my own perception, there was NO WAY I could handle another baby at that point in my life. With two small children, a husband who was a full-time student, living out of town, and a full time job, it simply seemed like an impossible feat. But as always, God knew I could handle it and he had a purpose for this tiny person. And gee, didn't it all work out so perfectly? Look where we are now? I can't imagine my life without this adorable, tender hearted, loving child. Perceived limits vs. actual limits... (Dear God, really... I think I've reached my actual limit on this one. Kindly requesting not to be proven wrong :)
Do I think God is telling me to run 100 miles? No way. Does He know I'm going to try anyway? Yes, He does. Does He know the intent I have in doing so and what I hope to make of it? Yes, He does. Does He know if I can do it? Yes, He does. Even if I don't know it. He already knows the outcome... whether I will complete it or not. But the outcome doesn't matter so much as the attempt in something like this and how I go forward with training and preparation.
I have a fund raising goal for this race (I really need to stop referring to this as a "race". That implies speed will be involved). In a few short weeks, more information about that will be put out, both here and on Facebook. My goal is to raise money for a select few organizations by obtaining pledges per mile. No money will go through me. All expenses incurred ... registration, travel, crew... will come out of my pocket and not be reimbursed by the pledges. Stayed tuned....
I am taking a risk and searching to bypass my perceived limits, but not quite reach my actual limit (I assume that is bad thing). I already know I can go 50 miles. I am certain I can also go 100. But don't be fooled, I am scared out of my wits to attempt it. I hope that the reminder of who/what charities will benefit from it serves to keep me strong and motivated during my training.
A few prayers from y'all would be nice too!
Sidenote: I got a lot of very nice e-mails from people who read about Sergio in my last post. Thank you for your prayers, especially for those who don't know him. Sergio's follow up appointment with his pediatrician revealed a grade 3 concussion. Concussions are labeled grade 1-4, depending on severity. The doctor was perplexed as his recovery is not matching the severity of what happened. Sergio is acting and recovering like a grade 1. Not that any one of us present needed it, but it is further proof of God's glaring presence in that gym as well as the power of prayer. Deb says that she is certain that when you call in angels for help, they come. Sergio had quite a few that night. Thank you for the prayers.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Play On
There are times in races or on runs when you must soldier on, despite what obstacles decide to pop up. Of course, everyone knows that we really have a choice of whether to keep going or shut it down, but sometimes we don't allow ourselves choices and we just continue. These reasons vary and are often times quite personal. Sometimes it's to prove to ourselves we can. Sometimes it's to prove to others that we can. And then sometimes it's to honor someone who we know would want us to go on... to keep trying, keep pushing and finish what was started. So often the ability to push aside the challenges and keep going are the result of years of life experience and practice. The trials of failure and the victories of winning serve to propel us forward until we are finished.
But there is nothing quite like witnessing the tough challenging of continuing on from a group of 13/14 year old boys, or as I like to call them, "man-children".
Will had his first regular season basketball game yesterday. We pulled into the parking lot simultaneously with my friend Deb and her family. Her son, Sergio, is a friend and teammate of Will's.
As Deb and I exchanged hellos, the boys walked ahead together and into the gym. Deb and I filed onto the bleachers and settled in to watch the end of a game already in progress. Somehow the conversation came to the startling fact that our boys were getting ready for high school. We talked about how some of our boys have been together since preschool. This was where Will met Sergio and I met Deb. We laughed as I recalled Will's 5th birthday party. As Deb dropped Sergio off, he asked his mom to write down their phone number in case he needed to call her. About midway through the party, Serg asked to use my phone. He took the crumpled up paper from his pocket and dialed the number. "Hi mom! What are you guys up to? Good... yes it's fun. I just called to say hi. Ok... I love you too. Bye." His little self could barely reach the phone dock on the wall as he tip-toed to hang up. He then proceeded to join the boys again as if all was well. I will never forget that. This small boy who needed his mom's voice of reassurance. Once he heard it, the world was right. We also laughed as Sergio then proceeded to invite all the boys to his house for a sleepover. He did that often, without first consulting with Deb. One time Sergio called Will and asked if he could spend the night. Knowing Sergio's habit of concocting grand parties without his mother's knowledge, I asked to speak to Deb. Sure enough, when Deb got on the phone, she knew nothing of the invitation and then said "That could explain why he's hiding under the table right now..."
When the game in progress was over, we moved seats to the "home" side and settled in. All the boys playing had known each other at least since kindergarten. I noticed the difference a year makes in watching the intensity of the playing. They all looked so BIG and were so physical. The game was intense and exciting, with our boys trailing by a hair, then getting ahead by a hair. Sometime during the third quarter, Will and Sergio collided while going for a rebound. In a split second both boys were on the ground. I saw the boy's coach jump up and run and as I looked over, I saw Sergio in the midst of a full-blown seizure.
Instinctively I raced over. Deb was already at his side. Sergio was having a grand mal seizure after the back of his head slammed to the gym floor. His arms were straight ahead and fists were closed tight and posturing. As I looked at his faced I noticed the blue color getting more apparent. Sergio was not breathing. His eyes were wide and fixed and his body was jerking wildly. Deb kept him on his left side as I began to recall the steps of CPR in my head. Would his mother be able to do this? Deb is an advanced practice nurse and was more than capable, but to her own boy? I kneeled down... frantic in my head, calm on the outside. In a frenzy of activity, I looked up and saw the boys... his friends... watching in horror as their friend lay on the ground. All I could do in the moment was say "God, please take over. Please help him." Nothing else came to mind. In an instant I feared that Deb and Steve were watching their son's life as they knew it, slip away. I feared that even with survival, a blow to the head that was hard enough to cause this seizure, was going to have some serious and life changing effects on his brain.
Slowly, Sergio's body began to relax. His grunts turned to deep breaths and the color began to return. With the blink of his eyes, he looked around and looked a bit perplexed. Deb continued to calmly talk to him and tell him he was ok. "Do you know what day it is?" In very slurred manner, Sergio replied, "Sunday." Praise God! "Do you know where you are?" "Basketball." Again, a wave of relief like none other washed over me (can't even imagine what that was like for Deb). Little by little, Sergio's speech became more coherent. "I hit my head... Jeezo Pete!" It was clear that he knew exactly who he was, where he was and what he had been doing. I heard the distant sound of siren's approaching. Deb kept him laying there and I noticed his right arm, still straight ahead and his fist clenched. I had yet to see him move (although she kept him still, I wasn't really sure he could move yet). When the paramedics arrived, they questioned him and his mother. I saw them check his head and then run their fingers down the back of his spine. Not having seen him move yet and noticing the position of his fist and arm, I held my breath, fearful of what was going to be discovered. "Hey buddy, can you sit up?" The EMT took his top arm and slowly Sergio began to move it. He then pushed himself up to a sitting position and looked up and began answering questions appropriately.
What I did not know was that while Sergio's body lay in a fit on the floor, one of the mom's had huddled his frightened teammates together. Some of them were crying. She led them in prayer. Now I don't know how often God gets the undivided attention of some very sincere, helpless, panic stricken eighth grade boys. But I can't help but think that God's infinite compassion and love for these young men who were turning to him had much to do with Sergio's amazing turnabout. I compare it to parents who love all of their children, fiercely and equally. But there is something about that little one who can ask for things unlike the bigger ones. Something happens that softens you so much when the tiniest voice in the family cries out in need or makes a request.
As Sergio was loaded on the stretcher and strapped in, they sat him up. I was certain the game was going to be called after that kind of traumatic event. But Sergio requested the game continue. And so after he was safely in the ambulance, the boys played on.
No doubt they were shaken. But those boys jumped back in the game and did as their buddy had requested. They finished it.
Sergio was taken to Children's Hospital, where he was evaluated and had a CAT scan. The scan was normal... no fracture in the skull and a bad concussion. And so with precautions, they sent him home.
I continue to witness God's presence and power everywhere. I am reminded how fragile this life is and how it can change in a split second. I am humbled beyond words that He was right with Sergio, his family and his friends and took complete control of a situation that could have gone so much differently. I believe these boys witnessed it also and for that, I am so thankful.
But there is nothing quite like witnessing the tough challenging of continuing on from a group of 13/14 year old boys, or as I like to call them, "man-children".
Will had his first regular season basketball game yesterday. We pulled into the parking lot simultaneously with my friend Deb and her family. Her son, Sergio, is a friend and teammate of Will's.
As Deb and I exchanged hellos, the boys walked ahead together and into the gym. Deb and I filed onto the bleachers and settled in to watch the end of a game already in progress. Somehow the conversation came to the startling fact that our boys were getting ready for high school. We talked about how some of our boys have been together since preschool. This was where Will met Sergio and I met Deb. We laughed as I recalled Will's 5th birthday party. As Deb dropped Sergio off, he asked his mom to write down their phone number in case he needed to call her. About midway through the party, Serg asked to use my phone. He took the crumpled up paper from his pocket and dialed the number. "Hi mom! What are you guys up to? Good... yes it's fun. I just called to say hi. Ok... I love you too. Bye." His little self could barely reach the phone dock on the wall as he tip-toed to hang up. He then proceeded to join the boys again as if all was well. I will never forget that. This small boy who needed his mom's voice of reassurance. Once he heard it, the world was right. We also laughed as Sergio then proceeded to invite all the boys to his house for a sleepover. He did that often, without first consulting with Deb. One time Sergio called Will and asked if he could spend the night. Knowing Sergio's habit of concocting grand parties without his mother's knowledge, I asked to speak to Deb. Sure enough, when Deb got on the phone, she knew nothing of the invitation and then said "That could explain why he's hiding under the table right now..."
When the game in progress was over, we moved seats to the "home" side and settled in. All the boys playing had known each other at least since kindergarten. I noticed the difference a year makes in watching the intensity of the playing. They all looked so BIG and were so physical. The game was intense and exciting, with our boys trailing by a hair, then getting ahead by a hair. Sometime during the third quarter, Will and Sergio collided while going for a rebound. In a split second both boys were on the ground. I saw the boy's coach jump up and run and as I looked over, I saw Sergio in the midst of a full-blown seizure.
Instinctively I raced over. Deb was already at his side. Sergio was having a grand mal seizure after the back of his head slammed to the gym floor. His arms were straight ahead and fists were closed tight and posturing. As I looked at his faced I noticed the blue color getting more apparent. Sergio was not breathing. His eyes were wide and fixed and his body was jerking wildly. Deb kept him on his left side as I began to recall the steps of CPR in my head. Would his mother be able to do this? Deb is an advanced practice nurse and was more than capable, but to her own boy? I kneeled down... frantic in my head, calm on the outside. In a frenzy of activity, I looked up and saw the boys... his friends... watching in horror as their friend lay on the ground. All I could do in the moment was say "God, please take over. Please help him." Nothing else came to mind. In an instant I feared that Deb and Steve were watching their son's life as they knew it, slip away. I feared that even with survival, a blow to the head that was hard enough to cause this seizure, was going to have some serious and life changing effects on his brain.
Slowly, Sergio's body began to relax. His grunts turned to deep breaths and the color began to return. With the blink of his eyes, he looked around and looked a bit perplexed. Deb continued to calmly talk to him and tell him he was ok. "Do you know what day it is?" In very slurred manner, Sergio replied, "Sunday." Praise God! "Do you know where you are?" "Basketball." Again, a wave of relief like none other washed over me (can't even imagine what that was like for Deb). Little by little, Sergio's speech became more coherent. "I hit my head... Jeezo Pete!" It was clear that he knew exactly who he was, where he was and what he had been doing. I heard the distant sound of siren's approaching. Deb kept him laying there and I noticed his right arm, still straight ahead and his fist clenched. I had yet to see him move (although she kept him still, I wasn't really sure he could move yet). When the paramedics arrived, they questioned him and his mother. I saw them check his head and then run their fingers down the back of his spine. Not having seen him move yet and noticing the position of his fist and arm, I held my breath, fearful of what was going to be discovered. "Hey buddy, can you sit up?" The EMT took his top arm and slowly Sergio began to move it. He then pushed himself up to a sitting position and looked up and began answering questions appropriately.
What I did not know was that while Sergio's body lay in a fit on the floor, one of the mom's had huddled his frightened teammates together. Some of them were crying. She led them in prayer. Now I don't know how often God gets the undivided attention of some very sincere, helpless, panic stricken eighth grade boys. But I can't help but think that God's infinite compassion and love for these young men who were turning to him had much to do with Sergio's amazing turnabout. I compare it to parents who love all of their children, fiercely and equally. But there is something about that little one who can ask for things unlike the bigger ones. Something happens that softens you so much when the tiniest voice in the family cries out in need or makes a request.
As Sergio was loaded on the stretcher and strapped in, they sat him up. I was certain the game was going to be called after that kind of traumatic event. But Sergio requested the game continue. And so after he was safely in the ambulance, the boys played on.
No doubt they were shaken. But those boys jumped back in the game and did as their buddy had requested. They finished it.
Sergio was taken to Children's Hospital, where he was evaluated and had a CAT scan. The scan was normal... no fracture in the skull and a bad concussion. And so with precautions, they sent him home.
I continue to witness God's presence and power everywhere. I am reminded how fragile this life is and how it can change in a split second. I am humbled beyond words that He was right with Sergio, his family and his friends and took complete control of a situation that could have gone so much differently. I believe these boys witnessed it also and for that, I am so thankful.
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| First grade trip to Applefest From left: Sergio, Claire, Michael H., Patrick, Will, Dylan and Jonathan All but Claire are on the basketball team, along with some not pictured |
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